As with Monday, I missed my daily post yesterday because I was at the hospital with my Mum. My Dad is still in intensive care. The ongoing status is “critical but stable”. It would be SO easy at this point to do a retrospective post about my Dad, what he means to me and my favourite memories. But I don’t want to do that because he IS still fighting and I don’t want to dwell on what was yet. No.
At the moment, I’m fairly consumed with concern for my Mum, who is doing an astonishing job at being strong. Even if she doesn’t think she is, she’s showing this remarkable strength that makes me proud to call her my Mum. Of course she’s hurting, I can see that. When other people comment how tough she’s coming across, I can see the pain in her eyes and the conviction she forces into every sentence. I know she’s being strong only for my Dad and me. Her world, I know that.
I don’t take for granted how incredibly lucky I am. I know so many people that have tense relationships with their mothers, if a relationship at all. Of course Mum and I had conflicts when I was growing up, my parents raised me to have my own mind and question all that was able to be questioned so of course we were going to have differing beliefs (for one, she’s a Christian and I’m not even remotely religious). There’s a sign of incredible parenting – I was never Christened in a church. Means I could make my own mind up about religion when I have the ability to do so, rather than having a convention imposed upon me when I was a baby. I’m eternally grateful for that level of devotion – I’m sure that my Mum in particular had some stick from people for not having me baptised.
My Mum is also who I hold as the pinnacle of love and openness. She shows nothing but acceptance to people in my life. The first time she met my husband, he was in the depths of a goth phase, with piercings, chains and black and white synth dreads. For a fairly traditional grown woman, it was a culture shock for my dear Ma. But she didn’t question a thing and today admits she considers my husband a son to her. She recently met my best friend Alex, who is singly the greatest female I’ve ever had the privilege of calling my friend. Despite being very different people, Mum and Alex instantly bonded and Mum has nothing but good things to say about this chick I rave on about. People often say the phrase ‘measure of man’ and I think my Mum has proven again and again that she’s the ‘the measure of a woman’.
Whatever happens Mum, we’ll get through this together and with the love and support of amazing people.
Thank you <3